Feeling Alone

I have friends, my mom and daughters that support me, but when I am home with my boyfriend, I feel so alone. He doesnt understand what i am going through and I dont know how many different ways i can try to explain it. I have normal daily and life stressed, but then adding worrying about how much to eat, how much protein, enough fluids, just to have someone to be there to say you are doing great and what can i do to help would be great. He seems to only cook what i have to tell him to do when he makes food..can be frustrating

Some men are not happy to have their girlfriends /wives lose weight. Sometimes they feel jealous. In the end you need to do this for yourself. My husband died in 2010, and in 2011 I almost died from failing health (Pulmonary Embolism) Since I lost 200 lb all my health issues have turned around, now I have textbook perfect blood work and I feel like a million dollars. I had no support from anyone here at that time and I received all my support online. My life revolved around talking to others who went through bariatric surgery, I looked at small sized clothes in catalogs, I cooked my meat and vegetables. I cooked my boneless skinless chicken breast and my green beans and stewed tomatoes and portioned them out in containers and froze what I couldn't eat within the next 3 days. That way I always had small portions to eat when I was hungry. You can do this! Don't rely on others, enjoy your journey to becoming thinner and healthier. We are here for your support!

So I'm 24 days out. I've had a few rough days vomiting. My husband says your drinking to much? I'm sick because not getting enough fluids! Trying to eat the 4 small meals a day then he says you eat all the time! I can only eat 1/2 a cup at a time! He's driving me crazy will not read my discharge papers he just seems to know it all and it's slowly killing me!

starla rogers said:

So I'm 24 days out. I've had a few rough days vomiting. My husband says your drinking to much? I'm sick because not getting enough fluids! Trying to eat the 4 small meals a day then he says you eat all the time! I can only eat 1/2 a cup at a time! He's driving me crazy will not read my discharge papers he just seems to know it all and it's slowly killing me!

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Do what YOU know to do. I'm sure it's frustrating and hurtful that he is not being supportive but this is for you! I will say that those first few weeks after surgery are the wort emotionally and everything feels horrible. It will get better, just don't give up!

Naomi979 said:

I have friends, my mom and daughters that support me, but when I am home with my boyfriend, I feel so alone. He doesnt understand what i am going through and I dont know how many different ways i can try to explain it. I have normal daily and life stressed, but then adding worrying about how much to eat, how much protein, enough fluids, just to have someone to be there to say you are doing great and what can i do to help would be great. He seems to only cook what i have to tell him to do when he makes food..can be frustrating

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I hope by now things have improved. How are you doing on your weight loss?

starla rogers said:

So I'm 24 days out. I've had a few rough days vomiting. My husband says your drinking to much? I'm sick because not getting enough fluids! Trying to eat the 4 small meals a day then he says you eat all the time! I can only eat 1/2 a cup at a time! He's driving me crazy will not read my discharge papers he just seems to know it all and it's slowly killing me!

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Men can be a pain in the butt. It sounds like he is trying to be helpful, but doesn't realize he is getting on your nerves. It's going to be a learning curve for both of you. Tell him that he is annoying you and that you need his help, but not his harping on you.

Naomi979 said:

I have friends, my mom and daughters that support me, but when I am home with my boyfriend, I feel so alone. He doesnt understand what i am going through and I dont know how many different ways i can try to explain it. I have normal daily and life stressed, but then adding worrying about how much to eat, how much protein, enough fluids, just to have someone to be there to say you are doing great and what can i do to help would be great. He seems to only cook what i have to tell him to do when he makes food..can be frustrating

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I am so lucky my wife takes care of me like a new born baby.
However I have taken control and I am doing more for myself.
She reminds me about my few meds now and that is about it
Surgery was on 11/3/2016

Naomi979 said:

I have friends, my mom and daughters that support me, but when I am home with my boyfriend, I feel so alone. He doesnt understand what i am going through and I dont know how many different ways i can try to explain it. I have normal daily and life stressed, but then adding worrying about how much to eat, how much protein, enough fluids, just to have someone to be there to say you are doing great and what can i do to help would be great. He seems to only cook what i have to tell him to do when he makes food..can be frustrating

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Hi Naomi. Sorry your boyfriend is so unsupportive. The only advise I can give is cook for yourself so you don't get mad at him and surround yourself with the people who are supportive. Wish I had better advise.

starla rogers said:

So I'm 24 days out. I've had a few rough days vomiting. My husband says your drinking to much? I'm sick because not getting enough fluids! Trying to eat the 4 small meals a day then he says you eat all the time! I can only eat 1/2 a cup at a time! He's driving me crazy will not read my discharge papers he just seems to know it all and it's slowly killing me!

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Hi Starla. By now I hope you are feeling better. I think part of your problem may have been trying to eat too much food. I'm 2 1/2 weeks out and have 3 meals per day of about 2 tsp full. I haven't been sick at all.

There are some men that feel like if you change than you will want them to change there bad habits. He may be worried that he will not live up to your new self. I also noticed my male friend acting crazy when he's baby boy was born. He was too nervous he would do the wrong thing, so he did nothing. So his wife started making list with pictures to make it easier to understand. She would talk to herself while looking at the chart so he could see her referencing the chart too. This would be great for keeping track of your water with check marks when you reach your goal.