dianeseattle
Member
I don't really know how to start this post, which is usually not a problem for me. In 6 months I have posted an average of 4.7 times every day. That is a lot of posts.
So I hope that 850 posts will suffice to be referred to and read by people who are experiencing challenges that I may have addressed correctly. Of course there's always the possibility I gave you the wrong answer, but if that's the case, somebody will make it correct.
Over that time, I have watched this group grow from being a kind of desert island to become a giant lush nurturing oasis. And it's no mirage.
In addition to the wonderful technical advice people have shared, what really makes this group work is the genuine love that we have for each other. It doesn't matter how long you've been here and it doesn't matter what you have experienced. When somebody responds to your post, they are doing it because they care about you.
In light of that, it may be a little confusing when I tell you that I am leaving the group. There are truly logical reasons why I'm doing this, and none of them are a reflection of the value of the group. I don't think I have ever seen such a wonderfully supportive support group.
I am a person who is easily obsessed. When I fixate on something I can put everything else aside in favor of it. Since I have been a member of this group, I literally have my phone in my hand all day long, scrolling through the posts, looking for new ones, writing replies, uploading what I think are helpful instructions, and the rest of it which is evidenced by my 850 posts.
A few weeks ago I kind of felt sick to my stomach when I realized all I was doing all day long was reading posts and writing posts to this group. I am a writer by trade. I've earned my living at it since 1984. I'm actually a little bit famous, because of the field I am in, which is 20th century American literature. Specifically my focus is the Beat Generation, and I literally have hundreds of books about it. In some of those books I actually wrote things that were published. And I had a literary agent in New York and strong, friendly relations with Viking Penguin. I started and oversaw an online university that studied the Beat Generation for more than 10 years. I have two partial manuscripts that have been expected to be published by Viking Penguin for a long time. But before that can happen, I need to finish them.
I see my time spent on the internet, whether it is noble or frivolous, as a way to avoid finishing these projects. Of all the kind of problems you can have that relate to self esteem, mine is fear of success. Can you believe that?
Participating in this group has flexed my writing muscle. I never failed to notice how much time I spent writing posts to our wonderful support group and how I spent no time working on my books, which could literally save my life by bringing in a nice income.
So this is goodbye for the time being. I am signing off with this, my 849th post, and I want you to know how much I love everyone here. You have just meant so much to me for the last 6 months and I am taking all your warm encouragement with me. I know you wish me well. I know you want me to finish these projects. I know you want to see my success.
After I finish and my books are published (or at least one of them is published), I'll check back in here and let you guys know where the books are and what they are titled so you can meet the real me. I'm also thinking of writing a book about my experience with bariatric surgery and the aftermath. If I do that, I might want to include some of your wisdom in it. If that is the case, I will contact you each and ask for your permission.
I love you and will miss you, but just think of me as someone you know who is saying aloha. Next time I say aloha it may be a greeting, not a parting.
If you want to send me a message, feel free to email me at dianedelux@protonmail.com. I check that email account once in awhile.
Take care and much love, diane
So I hope that 850 posts will suffice to be referred to and read by people who are experiencing challenges that I may have addressed correctly. Of course there's always the possibility I gave you the wrong answer, but if that's the case, somebody will make it correct.
Over that time, I have watched this group grow from being a kind of desert island to become a giant lush nurturing oasis. And it's no mirage.
In addition to the wonderful technical advice people have shared, what really makes this group work is the genuine love that we have for each other. It doesn't matter how long you've been here and it doesn't matter what you have experienced. When somebody responds to your post, they are doing it because they care about you.
In light of that, it may be a little confusing when I tell you that I am leaving the group. There are truly logical reasons why I'm doing this, and none of them are a reflection of the value of the group. I don't think I have ever seen such a wonderfully supportive support group.
I am a person who is easily obsessed. When I fixate on something I can put everything else aside in favor of it. Since I have been a member of this group, I literally have my phone in my hand all day long, scrolling through the posts, looking for new ones, writing replies, uploading what I think are helpful instructions, and the rest of it which is evidenced by my 850 posts.
A few weeks ago I kind of felt sick to my stomach when I realized all I was doing all day long was reading posts and writing posts to this group. I am a writer by trade. I've earned my living at it since 1984. I'm actually a little bit famous, because of the field I am in, which is 20th century American literature. Specifically my focus is the Beat Generation, and I literally have hundreds of books about it. In some of those books I actually wrote things that were published. And I had a literary agent in New York and strong, friendly relations with Viking Penguin. I started and oversaw an online university that studied the Beat Generation for more than 10 years. I have two partial manuscripts that have been expected to be published by Viking Penguin for a long time. But before that can happen, I need to finish them.
I see my time spent on the internet, whether it is noble or frivolous, as a way to avoid finishing these projects. Of all the kind of problems you can have that relate to self esteem, mine is fear of success. Can you believe that?
Participating in this group has flexed my writing muscle. I never failed to notice how much time I spent writing posts to our wonderful support group and how I spent no time working on my books, which could literally save my life by bringing in a nice income.
So this is goodbye for the time being. I am signing off with this, my 849th post, and I want you to know how much I love everyone here. You have just meant so much to me for the last 6 months and I am taking all your warm encouragement with me. I know you wish me well. I know you want me to finish these projects. I know you want to see my success.
After I finish and my books are published (or at least one of them is published), I'll check back in here and let you guys know where the books are and what they are titled so you can meet the real me. I'm also thinking of writing a book about my experience with bariatric surgery and the aftermath. If I do that, I might want to include some of your wisdom in it. If that is the case, I will contact you each and ask for your permission.
I love you and will miss you, but just think of me as someone you know who is saying aloha. Next time I say aloha it may be a greeting, not a parting.
If you want to send me a message, feel free to email me at dianedelux@protonmail.com. I check that email account once in awhile.
Take care and much love, diane
