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Hi everyone

Kathi_S

Kathi_S

Member
I'm new. Planning bypass surgery in August. Having some preop concerns. I am almost 61 years old. I've been able to lose weight many times but never been able to keep it off. Now I have developed some health issues that make it more important that I lose the weight and keep it off.

Here are my main concerns right now. While following the nutritionist's preop guidelines, chewing every bite 20 times, I find that food gets stuck in my gums and causes a lot of irritation. As a result, I have been eating mostly soft foods. Is this something I will have to do for the rest of my life?

Another concern is that I take a prescription anti-inflammatory for arthritis, which I've been told I will no longer be able to take after surgery because they will be too hard on my stomach lining. I need to talk to my primary care physician about this.

I am also worried about the about meals with family. My adult children are not very supportive of me having the surgery. My daughter just gave birth to our first grandchild. We have to travel to visit, so meals with them would be impossible to avoid. How do you get through this kind of thing?

I guess I am looking for reassurance that I will be able to eat somewhat regular food at some point. Thanks for any input and advice.

Kathi
 
Welcome Kathi! Congrats on starting your WLS journey. I had bypass in October 2020. You will need to talk to you primary about what you can take for your arthritis after surgery. I’m 38, but have advanced osteoarthritis in both knees so the thought of not being able to take NSAIDs again stressed me out. However Tylenol is fine and losing so much weight was really the relief my knees needed. Not saying they don’t still ache from time to time but certainly not as bad.
I have some issues with food getting stuck in my gums as well, it’s been an issue since I had braces in my teens. I just so rinse and floss after eating. It doesn’t work for everyone, but it helps me.
Now, the thing with your family. You don’t need them to be on board with your choices, but they need to respect them and you need to tell them why. Family dinners shouldn’t be a problem unless someone makes it a problem. After a certain amount of time you’ll be able to eat anything that’s made, just in smaller proportions. I have burgers, no bun, pizza but only a slice or 2, pasta but very small portion with chicken. What types of meals does your family have when they get together?
Remind them that you want to be around a long time for your grand baby-and anymore that might come along-so small adjustments on their parts for short periods of time should not be that big of a deal.
 
Your concerns are very normal. Here are a few things to consider.

Regardless of your diet experiences in the past, you have a better chance of losing the weight and keeping it off after surgery. Without getting into the weeds, there are hormonal issues that fight against weight loss when you are obese. The surgery actually affects these signals in a positive way and allows you to lose the weight. Yes, we do still have to choose to eat a healthy diet, but it doesn't mean you can't enjoy food or social situations. You may not eat as much, but you can concentrate more on playing with your new grandchild instead of eating. :)

The chewing thing. Regardless of the surgery, it's actually good practice to chew foods well. It helps with digestion and absorption of some nutrients. I can't speak for my friends who have had the bypass, but I generally don't chew things that well anymore, but I did early on after surgery while I was healing.

The inflammation. You may discover that after you start losing the weight that your inflammation gets significantly better. A lot of chronic inflammation can be influenced by the diet we have. Transitioning to a healthy diet after surgery and lowering your weight can have many positive effects on inflammation and also general stress on the body. You may be able to avoid pain relievers all together or you may need significantly less, but you won't be taking NSAIDs with a bypass, it would be some other type of pain reliever. Hopefully, however, the new diet and weight loss would minimize your need for those medications.

Regarding your family. I'm sorry they aren't 100% supportive. That often happens because people don't understand why diets don't work and how the surgery works, etc. There are a lot of misconceptions about it out there. Some people will be willing to listen and learn, and others won't. What they should understand is that you are taking steps to not only increase your own quality of life, but improve your interactions with your kids and grandkids. It shouldn't be about the food, and frankly, while I know food is socially important for some people, it should take a back seat to health and vitality and having an active and loving mother/grandmother for as long as possible. Hopefully they can understand that part.

It will take a while after surgery, but you'll start adding regular foods back in. There may be some things you don't tolerate well, and other things will be just fine. Everyone is a bit different in that regard. You'll be able to eat a variety of foods and enjoy them during special occasions and visits, but it will be in smaller amounts, which should be okay for anyone. When you leave, you eat your healthy diet again and all will be right with the world, hopefully.
 
Thanks to all. These answers have all helped to relieve some preop anxiety issues. I was actually considering canceling my surgery and just making one last attempt at losing the weight and keeping it off on my own.

My biggest concern with that is that history is the best predictor of the future. In the past I have been able to lose as much as 100 lbs, getting my bmi to 30, but only able to maintain it for a few years. I am already almost 61, pre-diabetic, suffer from both obstructive and Central sleep apnea, asthma, fibromyalgia, arthritis, aortic and mitral valve problems and several other issues. I worry that if I put off the surgery, and attempt to do it on my own and fail, I will risk developing diabetes, and worsening of my current conditions and also being even older when I do have surgery, which means more possible complications.

When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, I decided I didn't want want to live to be an old lady, because the pain was so bad. Since then, I have learned ways help cope with the pain most of the time by staying active. I also have a loving husband, family, and have recently become a grandma! Now more than ever I want to live a long healthy life. I do believe surgery is my best option for this.

I will probably be posting a lot more questions as they occur and really appreciate your supportive answers!

Kathi
 
I had my surgery feb 15, I am 61 also. This decision for surgery is not entered into lightly. If you don’t get the support you need from family and friends you will get it here. Time will give others tie to catch up as you move through your journey. Be confident in your choice, do not be ashamed. This is your health and your body and only you know how important this is. This site is a wealth and goldmine of information and support. Check back often. Share what you feel comfortable sharing. We are here for you.
 
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