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Is depression normal after surgery?

R

Reptar Kay

Member
I had VSG on 9-18-19, and I regret it so far. I really hope it gets better for me, because so far, I believe it has completely ruined my life. I am much more unhappy now, than before. And I know this is not typical, as everyone who I know who's had it at my support group, hasn't felt this way. So I don't know where to turn to for help, and compassion, because I feel so alone. I'm 6'3, and was 385lbs at my heaviest, and weigh 269lbs currently. That sounds like a big drop, but I have only lost about 21lbs post-op in 2 weeks. When I lost over 80 pre-op. So the surgery hasn't been very helpful in my weight loss at all. I lost 20lbs my first week, but have only lost 1 pound in my second week.

I thought this surgery was going to change my life for the better, and save me from diabetes, hypertension, stroke, etc. And that it will also help me keep off the weight long-term. Because I had been obese my entire life, from when I was 5 years old. But I believe it's made my life worse, and that I've made the biggest mistake in my life. But looking online, and in my real life, and in all my pre-surgery research, nobody else seems to feel that way.

I now have to worry about things I've never had to before. I now I have to drink water all the time, so I don't become dehydrated. Which I didn't think was going to be a big deal because I drank water all the time. But now it's become a chore. I've never had to worry about dehydration in my life. And now I have to worry about vitamin deficiency, and protein deficiency. Something I never had to worry about before. And I simply can't eat enough of the required amount of protein. Something I didn't consider, and I never had a problem getting protein shakes down before. And now I'm forever worried that my teeth are going to rot and fall out because I simply can't drink the protein shakes, and that my body will be weakened because I have no protein. And I also can't take pills. I don't know if that will last forever. But right now they need to be crushed, and they taste horrible. I haven't eaten food yet. But the drinking seems to be a much bigger problem for me, as I am having difficulty with the new drinking regimen.

And the worst is how it has effected my emotionally. I am going through extreme postsurgery depression. I gave up everything I love forever to have this surgery (carbonated beverages, caffine, asprin, straws, eating and drinking concurrently, eating fast, gulping down drinks, chewing gum, etc), because I thought this was going to be the best decision I've ever made for my health. But so far all I've gotten from it is extreme depression, withdrawal, bloating, stomach pains, anxiety attacks from the regret. Luckily I never smoked or drank alcohol to begin with. So I don't have withdrawals from that.

But carbonated drinks has been the hardest part. I haven't drank soda is 14 years, when I switched to seltzer. And I fell in love with seltzer. Perrier was my favorite drink, and I drank it all the time. I miss it so much. But I thought that giving it up, was going to be a decision that would make my life better. I really hope that this depression is temporary. But I know a lot of people who have had VSG, and they didn't experience any of this emotional depression.

And anywhere I go, everyone seems to feel the exact opposite that I do. And I can't seem to find support anywhere. All I've gotten is a lot of "that's just how life is now, adjust." I know that. I know I can't do anything about it. But I'm actually suffering from pure clinical depression, and I feel like I'm the only one, and that it will never go away.
 
Your body has gone through so many changes, hormonal, structural, etc.... Your body needs time to heal. Remove all expectations and let your body do what it is designed to do. Soon the routine will become just that, routine. You will always be thinking about protein but meeting quotas will come more naturally. You won't be perfect at it for a while and that's ok. This journey is a marathon.
That said, talk to your doc asap! Clinical depression is serious and it can be treated.
Oh and also, it depends on where people are in their journey as to how they feel about this path of wls. A lot of us have bouts of despair early on but are happier the farther out we get. Talk to me week 2 and I think I've made a mistake. Talk to me now at week 12/13 and I am happy with my decision and learning a lot, especially about substitutions that can satisfy cravings.
 
Reptar Kay said:
I had VSG on 9-18-19, and I regret it so far. I really hope it gets better for me, because so far, I believe it has completely ruined my life. I am much more unhappy now, than before. And I know this is not typical, as everyone who I know who's had it at my support group, hasn't felt this way. So I don't know where to turn to for help, and compassion, because I feel so alone. I'm 6'3, and was 385lbs at my heaviest, and weigh 269lbs currently. That sounds like a big drop, but I have only lost about 21lbs post-op in 2 weeks. When I lost over 80 pre-op. So the surgery hasn't been very helpful in my weight loss at all. I lost 20lbs my first week, but have only lost 1 pound in my second week.

I thought this surgery was going to change my life for the better, and save me from diabetes, hypertension, stroke, etc. And that it will also help me keep off the weight long-term. Because I had been obese my entire life, from when I was 5 years old. But I believe it's made my life worse, and that I've made the biggest mistake in my life. But looking online, and in my real life, and in all my pre-surgery research, nobody else seems to feel that way.

I now have to worry about things I've never had to before. I now I have to drink water all the time, so I don't become dehydrated. Which I didn't think was going to be a big deal because I drank water all the time. But now it's become a chore. I've never had to worry about dehydration in my life. And now I have to worry about vitamin deficiency, and protein deficiency. Something I never had to worry about before. And I simply can't eat enough of the required amount of protein. Something I didn't consider, and I never had a problem getting protein shakes down before. And now I'm forever worried that my teeth are going to rot and fall out because I simply can't drink the protein shakes, and that my body will be weakened because I have no protein. And I also can't take pills. I don't know if that will last forever. But right now they need to be crushed, and they taste horrible. I haven't eaten food yet. But the drinking seems to be a much bigger problem for me, as I am having difficulty with the new drinking regimen.

And the worst is how it has effected my emotionally. I am going through extreme postsurgery depression. I gave up everything I love forever to have this surgery (carbonated beverages, caffine, asprin, straws, eating and drinking concurrently, eating fast, gulping down drinks, chewing gum, etc), because I thought this was going to be the best decision I've ever made for my health. But so far all I've gotten from it is extreme depression, withdrawal, bloating, stomach pains, anxiety attacks from the regret. Luckily I never smoked or drank alcohol to begin with. So I don't have withdrawals from that.

But carbonated drinks has been the hardest part. I haven't drank soda is 14 years, when I switched to seltzer. And I fell in love with seltzer. Perrier was my favorite drink, and I drank it all the time. I miss it so much. But I thought that giving it up, was going to be a decision that would make my life better. I really hope that this depression is temporary. But I know a lot of people who have had VSG, and they didn't experience any of this emotional depression.

And anywhere I go, everyone seems to feel the exact opposite that I do. And I can't seem to find support anywhere. All I've gotten is a lot of "that's just how life is now, adjust." I know that. I know I can't do anything about it. But I'm actually suffering from pure clinical depression, and I feel like I'm the only one, and that it will never go away.
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You are to early in to think you have make a mistake by having this surgery. You body needs to heal. That takes time.
Did your doctor explain all of the changes you would need to make before you surgery? I’m 4 weeks in and there are still days
Ask myself why did I have it done. Well I want a better quality of life, I want to live longer.etc that’s why I had it done.
As far a being depressed. I have those days also. I still don’t have a lot of energy, and that depresses me on some days.
I keep reminding myself it takes time, I will get there. Don’t give up this early, give your body time.
 
Reptar Kay said:
I had VSG on 9-18-19, and I regret it so far. I really hope it gets better for me, because so far, I believe it has completely ruined my life. I am much more unhappy now, than before. And I know this is not typical, as everyone who I know who's had it at my support group, hasn't felt this way. So I don't know where to turn to for help, and compassion, because I feel so alone. I'm 6'3, and was 385lbs at my heaviest, and weigh 269lbs currently. That sounds like a big drop, but I have only lost about 21lbs post-op in 2 weeks. When I lost over 80 pre-op. So the surgery hasn't been very helpful in my weight loss at all. I lost 20lbs my first week, but have only lost 1 pound in my second week.

I thought this surgery was going to change my life for the better, and save me from diabetes, hypertension, stroke, etc. And that it will also help me keep off the weight long-term. Because I had been obese my entire life, from when I was 5 years old. But I believe it's made my life worse, and that I've made the biggest mistake in my life. But looking online, and in my real life, and in all my pre-surgery research, nobody else seems to feel that way.

I now have to worry about things I've never had to before. I now I have to drink water all the time, so I don't become dehydrated. Which I didn't think was going to be a big deal because I drank water all the time. But now it's become a chore. I've never had to worry about dehydration in my life. And now I have to worry about vitamin deficiency, and protein deficiency. Something I never had to worry about before. And I simply can't eat enough of the required amount of protein. Something I didn't consider, and I never had a problem getting protein shakes down before. And now I'm forever worried that my teeth are going to rot and fall out because I simply can't drink the protein shakes, and that my body will be weakened because I have no protein. And I also can't take pills. I don't know if that will last forever. But right now they need to be crushed, and they taste horrible. I haven't eaten food yet. But the drinking seems to be a much bigger problem for me, as I am having difficulty with the new drinking regimen.

And the worst is how it has effected my emotionally. I am going through extreme postsurgery depression. I gave up everything I love forever to have this surgery (carbonated beverages, caffine, asprin, straws, eating and drinking concurrently, eating fast, gulping down drinks, chewing gum, etc), because I thought this was going to be the best decision I've ever made for my health. But so far all I've gotten from it is extreme depression, withdrawal, bloating, stomach pains, anxiety attacks from the regret. Luckily I never smoked or drank alcohol to begin with. So I don't have withdrawals from that.

But carbonated drinks has been the hardest part. I haven't drank soda is 14 years, when I switched to seltzer. And I fell in love with seltzer. Perrier was my favorite drink, and I drank it all the time. I miss it so much. But I thought that giving it up, was going to be a decision that would make my life better. I really hope that this depression is temporary. But I know a lot of people who have had VSG, and they didn't experience any of this emotional depression.

And anywhere I go, everyone seems to feel the exact opposite that I do. And I can't seem to find support anywhere. All I've gotten is a lot of "that's just how life is now, adjust." I know that. I know I can't do anything about it. But I'm actually suffering from pure clinical depression, and I feel like I'm the only one, and that it will never go away.
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So many of us have been in your shoes. It is a total life change, not just physical. Please talk to your doctor about a referral to a mental health professional or possibly an anti-depressant. I wouldn't have been half as stable as I was in the beginning without my Zoloft. As Annie mentioned, there are actual hormonal changes happening in your body right now. I believe my med kept me somewhat stable during the havoc that brings.

It will get easier, lots of people feel like this early on. I know that doesn't make you feel any better today but hang in there.

I get you on carbonated drinks. I've been a diet soda fiend my whole life. Since surgery, I've been drinking Diet Snapple and Hint waters instead. I missed the carbonation a lot in the beginning, I doubt that ever goes away completely, but it doesn't cross my mind all the time anymore.

I know it feels like you gave up everything but you will start reaping the rewards of surgery. It is normal to have stalls like you have in week 2. As you start loosing again, you'll remember why you made this decision and changing these habits doesn't feel like so much of a sacrifice anymore.

Stick with what your doctor told you in the early stages but just an FYI, my doctor is fine with caffeine, using straws & chewing gum. So I don't believe those are absolute no-nos. Down the road, you may be able to reintroduce these things. And while eating and drinking together is a no-no, I can admit that I haven't been adhering to this completely. I'll take a tiny sip to cleanse my palate every now and then. I'm not suggesting that you break any rules, I'm just saying that we need to find ways to adapt to our new normal or else we're setting ourselves up to fail down the road.

I'm glad you found us, please keep writing. We have a great group of people here who want to help. I hope today is a better day for you.
 
It gets so much better... give your body and your mind time to adjust and heal. It is a hard journey, mentally more than physically, but it really does get easier. This whole this is an entire lifestyle upheaval and you have to change how you deal with things you once went to food for, plus surgery in general can lead to temporary depression. Perhaps ask your doc about something temporary to help get you thru the hump on the depression while you adjust.
 
It is such a hard lifestyle change and the depression is real. I also take Wellbutrin and it has helped a lot.Do not be afraid to ask your surgeon or PCP to write you a script. They do take a little time to kick in and do their job.
I'm also not supposed to chew gum but I do anyway because I have a constant dry mouth. My nutritionist said it is because they do not want anyone to accidentally swallow it and get stuck.
I also almost always have to take at least one or two tiny sips while I am eating, sometimes you just need it to get the food moving.
It will absolutely get better. I am 8 weeks out RNY. I lost no weight during week 2 and 3 and then it caught up the next week. The body also has to adjust, sometimes your body is in starvation mode and tries to hang on to every ounce. Once the calories are coming it then the body starts letting go of the weight.

It will get better, don't lose hope.
 
Reptar Kay said:
I had VSG on 9-18-19, and I regret it so far. I really hope it gets better for me, because so far, I believe it has completely ruined my life. I am much more unhappy now, than before. And I know this is not typical, as everyone who I know who's had it at my support group, hasn't felt this way. So I don't know where to turn to for help, and compassion, because I feel so alone. I'm 6'3, and was 385lbs at my heaviest, and weigh 269lbs currently. That sounds like a big drop, but I have only lost about 21lbs post-op in 2 weeks. When I lost over 80 pre-op. So the surgery hasn't been very helpful in my weight loss at all. I lost 20lbs my first week, but have only lost 1 pound in my second week.

I thought this surgery was going to change my life for the better, and save me from diabetes, hypertension, stroke, etc. And that it will also help me keep off the weight long-term. Because I had been obese my entire life, from when I was 5 years old. But I believe it's made my life worse, and that I've made the biggest mistake in my life. But looking online, and in my real life, and in all my pre-surgery research, nobody else seems to feel that way.

I now have to worry about things I've never had to before. I now I have to drink water all the time, so I don't become dehydrated. Which I didn't think was going to be a big deal because I drank water all the time. But now it's become a chore. I've never had to worry about dehydration in my life. And now I have to worry about vitamin deficiency, and protein deficiency. Something I never had to worry about before. And I simply can't eat enough of the required amount of protein. Something I didn't consider, and I never had a problem getting protein shakes down before. And now I'm forever worried that my teeth are going to rot and fall out because I simply can't drink the protein shakes, and that my body will be weakened because I have no protein. And I also can't take pills. I don't know if that will last forever. But right now they need to be crushed, and they taste horrible. I haven't eaten food yet. But the drinking seems to be a much bigger problem for me, as I am having difficulty with the new drinking regimen.

And the worst is how it has effected my emotionally. I am going through extreme postsurgery depression. I gave up everything I love forever to have this surgery (carbonated beverages, caffine, asprin, straws, eating and drinking concurrently, eating fast, gulping down drinks, chewing gum, etc), because I thought this was going to be the best decision I've ever made for my health. But so far all I've gotten from it is extreme depression, withdrawal, bloating, stomach pains, anxiety attacks from the regret. Luckily I never smoked or drank alcohol to begin with. So I don't have withdrawals from that.

But carbonated drinks has been the hardest part. I haven't drank soda is 14 years, when I switched to seltzer. And I fell in love with seltzer. Perrier was my favorite drink, and I drank it all the time. I miss it so much. But I thought that giving it up, was going to be a decision that would make my life better. I really hope that this depression is temporary. But I know a lot of people who have had VSG, and they didn't experience any of this emotional depression.

And anywhere I go, everyone seems to feel the exact opposite that I do. And I can't seem to find support anywhere. All I've gotten is a lot of "that's just how life is now, adjust." I know that. I know I can't do anything about it. But I'm actually suffering from pure clinical depression, and I feel like I'm the only one, and that it will never go away.
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I had my surgery on 9/11 and I've been going through the same thing. I told the nurses I was having a hard time drinking and the berated me. Drinking water is tougher now. My taste changed and the drink mixes taste awful to me now. Last week I did regret my decision some. I've always suffered from depression.

However this week is better. I've graduated up to mushy food. Drinking is still hard. However I have always walked around dehydrated so for me as long as I'm trying I'm better off than I was.

I've lost 75lbs since February and I hope to lose a hundred more. I don't plan to avoid all good forever though but appreciate the tool I have to prevent my cravings from driving my eating habits. We can slowly go back over time, in small amounts, and enjoy food In moderation. It took me 30 years to stretch my stomach enough to be a pig. Now I have a stomach of a 5 year old. Time Marches on.

Plus soon I can exercise which will be a huge reward. I'm going to review the list of things I want to do after weight loss again to keep my depression from taking hold. Try focusing on what you can do after the weight loss and not what you can't.

I did not realize how fundamentally life-changing this would be. However it is done now so get busy redefining life for yourself. One not centered around food. That's what I'm going to try and do.

Good luck!
 
Reptar Kay said:
I had VSG on 9-18-19, and I regret it so far. I really hope it gets better for me, because so far, I believe it has completely ruined my life. I am much more unhappy now, than before. And I know this is not typical, as everyone who I know who's had it at my support group, hasn't felt this way. So I don't know where to turn to for help, and compassion, because I feel so alone. I'm 6'3, and was 385lbs at my heaviest, and weigh 269lbs currently. That sounds like a big drop, but I have only lost about 21lbs post-op in 2 weeks. When I lost over 80 pre-op. So the surgery hasn't been very helpful in my weight loss at all. I lost 20lbs my first week, but have only lost 1 pound in my second week.

I thought this surgery was going to change my life for the better, and save me from diabetes, hypertension, stroke, etc. And that it will also help me keep off the weight long-term. Because I had been obese my entire life, from when I was 5 years old. But I believe it's made my life worse, and that I've made the biggest mistake in my life. But looking online, and in my real life, and in all my pre-surgery research, nobody else seems to feel that way.

I now have to worry about things I've never had to before. I now I have to drink water all the time, so I don't become dehydrated. Which I didn't think was going to be a big deal because I drank water all the time. But now it's become a chore. I've never had to worry about dehydration in my life. And now I have to worry about vitamin deficiency, and protein deficiency. Something I never had to worry about before. And I simply can't eat enough of the required amount of protein. Something I didn't consider, and I never had a problem getting protein shakes down before. And now I'm forever worried that my teeth are going to rot and fall out because I simply can't drink the protein shakes, and that my body will be weakened because I have no protein. And I also can't take pills. I don't know if that will last forever. But right now they need to be crushed, and they taste horrible. I haven't eaten food yet. But the drinking seems to be a much bigger problem for me, as I am having difficulty with the new drinking regimen.

And the worst is how it has effected my emotionally. I am going through extreme postsurgery depression. I gave up everything I love forever to have this surgery (carbonated beverages, caffine, asprin, straws, eating and drinking concurrently, eating fast, gulping down drinks, chewing gum, etc), because I thought this was going to be the best decision I've ever made for my health. But so far all I've gotten from it is extreme depression, withdrawal, bloating, stomach pains, anxiety attacks from the regret. Luckily I never smoked or drank alcohol to begin with. So I don't have withdrawals from that.

But carbonated drinks has been the hardest part. I haven't drank soda is 14 years, when I switched to seltzer. And I fell in love with seltzer. Perrier was my favorite drink, and I drank it all the time. I miss it so much. But I thought that giving it up, was going to be a decision that would make my life better. I really hope that this depression is temporary. But I know a lot of people who have had VSG, and they didn't experience any of this emotional depression.

And anywhere I go, everyone seems to feel the exact opposite that I do. And I can't seem to find support anywhere. All I've gotten is a lot of "that's just how life is now, adjust." I know that. I know I can't do anything about it. But I'm actually suffering from pure clinical depression, and I feel like I'm the only one, and that it will never go away.
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By no means are you alone. I have suffered from depression for almost half of my life and it is a very hard thing. I agree with everyone else that you need to talk to your dr about anti-depressants. They truly do work wonders (coming from the girl that would feel fine and think, I don't need these any more so I quit and was soon back in the black pit of despair trying to claw my way back out -- I don't know how many times I have fallen into that trap). But this doesn't just happen with you are having problems after the surgery. My surgery went really well and I am one of those best case scenarios. Yet I still have days were I just don't want to do it anymore. I can't take another vitamin, drink another drink, eat another bite, or walk another step. I just get fed up and hate myself for the decision I made. But you will come out of that! Whether you find support in family and friends and they help pull you though, you go to a therapist and talk about it, or you simply start taking a medication to help, it will happen. I wish you the best of luck with this. When you are feeling down and have nowhere to turn about it, remember we are all here for you! While things may seem great for us in a moment, it isn't always so and we really can relate to your feelings.
 
Thank you for all the compassion. I have since gone to my Dr, as well as a therapist, and have gotten anti-depressants, which have been working. And to those of you who claimed they worked wonders, you were right. They have been working seemingly overnight. And I feel so much better. My surgeon also eased my mind, and explained to me from a medical sense as to why I did this. And that my life would've been much worse in the long run. He reminded me that I had high cholesterol (now under control), was pre-diabetic (A1C Levels now normal), and over 200lbs overweight (now >100lbs), low self esteem, etc), and that his team would never encourage me to do a surgery if they didn't feel it was 100% necessary. My PCP also said that I will be able to drink seltzer again. As silly as it sounds, that was really weighing heavy on my mind. More than any food. And I feel much better. I was reminded by my Dr why I did this, and my mind was put at ease. And now I can drink so much more, and less frequently. Last week was a dark week, but today I feel so much better.
 
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Reptar Kay said:
Thank you for all the compassion. I have since gone to my Dr, and have gotten anti-depressants, which have been working. And I feel much better. I was reminded by my Dr why I did this, and my mind was put at ease. And now I can drink so much more, and less frequently. Last week was a dark week, but today I feel so much better.
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I'm so glad to hear that you're doing better. Hang in there and keep us posted. :)
 
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