MARCH TOPIC - Mental vs Physical Hunger

[missyinacage]

I asked my husband today what 3 things he wished he had known before having WLS. His immediate response was about how his psychological hunger has not really left him, while physically he's only been hungry maybe twice in the past 3 weeks. This intrigued me, since this is the exact struggle that I am still having almost 21 months post op. And I thought, HEY what a great topic of conversation for the group.

So, a few questions. Answer any and all that you may have an answer or suggestion for.

1. How can you tell the difference between mental and physical hunger?
2. What are the things that trigger mental hunger for you?
3. What are your tricks for overcoming your mental hunger?

I will share my (and Dave's) answers on a response to the thread.

 

[missyinacage]

I am sharing both my answers and my husband, Dave's. This is because I am almost 2 years post-op, and he will be 3 weeks post op tomorrow This group has a lot of members in a lot of different phases. And I really liked his answer to #3.


(M) 1. I get an empty feeling and my stomach gets grumbly and crampy.
(D) 1. Dave said his stomach feels very empty and acidic when he is physically hungry.

(M) 2. Stress triggers mental hunger for me. Mindlessness can make me overeat but the stress of mentally beating myself up over it can trigger more mental hunger. There is a reason so many foods are called "comfort foods". They are very soothing for me when I am feeling very stressed.
(D) 2. Seeing solid food. Going into the fridge, as he would habitually grab something to eat if he opened the fridge. Regularly scheduled mealtimes. For example, just knowing that it's TIME to eat can lead him to want to eat. He's not really hungry but he really wants to CHEW.

(M) 3. I really have to remind myself that those comfort foods are actually going to make me feel worse, not better. Both mentally and physically. If I overeat, I'm going to not feel well, possibly make myself ill, and then I'm going to be mad and say mean things to myself. Which is NOT going to help my stress level. I also try to remind myself that I am worth taking the time to put healthy fuel into my body. And that I worked really fucking hard to get here and I'm NOT going back over a few tasty bites. EVER. Or I just get the heck away from food!
(D) 3. He said he looks at his scars. They are still red, a little swollen, scabby and can be painful. If that is what his SMALL wounds look like, what does his stomach wound look like?!? What are the possible consequences of taking a bite of a cheeseburger (his dream food lol) to his health both now and in the future?

 

[CarolKacz]

1. I am about a month post op so I am still trying to learn mental hungry vs real hunger.

2. I was a huge stress eater and I'm struggling with that now. Walking away from the fridge and trying to create new habits instead of going to food.

3. I'm still new and still learning. I've been trying to stick to a some what regular meal routine. Every time I think I am hungry I ask myself... Are you really hungry or do you just want to eat. Most of the time it is the latter. And I've been trying to create new habits to handle my stress.

 

[JudyNY]

Great topic Missy!

I am almost 2 years out...

1) I need to learn how to stop myself and really ask the question if it is head hunger or physical hunger before I eat. I am working on that since bad habits have returned and I am working hard at figuring out why, what has changed? With an eating disorder one doesn't take the time to think about it first, rather just acts on the impulse. Last night I was pretty satisfied after dinner and I thought I wouldn't have anything else for the evening. But I was up later than usual and hunger did strike. I waited a good 30 minutes to make sure it wasn't just head hunger. It wasn't. I felt that empty stomach feeling. So I did give in and got myself something to eat. But I only ate the thing that I decided to eat, nothing more. That was the plus for me as eating that late sometimes leads to a binge. I told myself I was in control. "Honor thy hunger, respect thy fullness" which is what they teach you with Intuitive Eating. I went to bed feeling I accomplished that.

2) I just watched a video by a doctor who had VSG herself. She discussed the impact stress has on trying to lose weight. Not only does it make you lean on comfort foods but there's physical proof how your body has a harder time losing weight when you are under daily stress. What is the first thing I reach for while under stress? FOOD. Do I stop to ask if I am hungry? NO. After watching that video I see how important it is to destress as much as possible.

3) This is something that I am currently trying to figure out what works best for me. If I am able, sometimes it means getting in the car and going somewhere to distract me. Or going for a walk. But most of my damage is done late afternoon or night time, so I need different options. Going to bed early helps, even taking an afternoon power nap. Right now, I am using the word "STOP" a lot. Giving myself pause before I mindlessly eat and think about all that I've gone through.

 

[3momchaos]

I am 17 months out from gastric bypass and there are times I struggle with all of these.

Mental hunger has to do with boredom for me. If I’m not occupied doing something, I’ll want to eat to “fill the space”. I try to keep busy to avoid mental hunger. I know when I’m physically hungry by body signs like stomach gurgling, or just tracking the time I last ate. If I wait too long between eating I tend to rush and find something quick or eat fast. My problem is also in the afternoons and evenings because I tend not to eat much earlier in the day or at lunch. This has always been a struggle of mine, so this is not a post op issue. I won’t eat enough and then by the time late afternoon arrives, I’m so hungry and I will eat whatever I can get my hands on. I try to keep healthier options around for a quick grab, but I need to focus more on eating enough during the earlier hours of the day. It’s a work in progress.

 

[TraceyT]

I’m a touch over 2 years post op - and I’m still a work in progress - and will be until I die.

1 - I don’t feel hungry much at all. I eat something usually every 4 hours or so. Now with that said - if I miss a snack/meal - my husband says I get “pissy and mean”. I explained to him that wasn’t about the hunger it was because of him - doing that in and out thing he does all the time - you know BREATHING. I actually get light headed and or nauseated. As soon as I eat something it goes away.

2 - I honestly think everyone on the planet has a stressor that causes them to eat. For me I think it was less about stress more of habit. It was nothing for me to grab the container of ice cream out of the freezer jump in my recliner and eat all of the ice cream and watch tv. I’d do the same thing with chips or cookies - not just a few but the whole bag or package. It was a habit.

3 - Now - I only eat at the kitchen table. All my snacks are portioned out which means I just grab the baggie or container and that’s what I eat. Eating ONLY at the table makes me more aware of what I’m eating and it’s a small thing that works for me. This has eliminated so many bad eating habits for me. I also track everything I put in my mouth. I journal the good, the bad, the ugly, the what the hell were thinking, and even the fuck me sideways. Being honest about what I put in my body and journaling daily is a huge part of what’s helped me. It’s interesting to go back and read what was going on when I was having fuck me sideways days. Sometimes it was truly nothing much at all and sometimes it was like the world was ending.

I know that no matter what kind of day I have - if I eat nothing “good for me” tomorrow is a new day and it starts with a clean slate.

Another thing that helps me with all of these things is that I can share it all with my husband. we talk about it and every once in a while my husband actually has a true pearl of wisdom to share - even then he gets a loud ass eye roll - and he says “I’ve been telling you for years I have a brain - I more than a pretty face! I also have a nice ass - or at least this cute little woman who lives here tells me I do”. This is also followed by a loud eye roll. I truly believe that the eye rolls turn my husband on - because he keeps doing shit that requires the eye roll response!

For me this WLS journey is a continuing work in progress. The farther I go - the better the journey becomes. It’s been an eye opening extraordinary journey this far and I’m looking forward to the next stage in my life.