What's Running Around in My Head

[WazzuCoug]

I'm six days post-op now (as the clock just passes midnight as I write this). I feel like things have gone very well for me so far. There hasn't been much nausea. The pain has diminished every day. I'm walking about a mile and a half each morning. I'm getting in all my protein and liquids. So, for all of that - yay!

However, there is the weird side of things. Although I'm not hungry, I feel like I should be eating more. The desire to have something other than liquid, yogurt, or jello doesn't help. Everything is very sweet, so I dilute it down. I feel like I could just snack all day like I used to, but I desperately don't want to go down that road again. Sometimes, I wonder if my stomach is actually 1/10th the size that it was before surgery, or if it was all fake (not really, but that is the weird stuff I think about). I wonder how I'm going to resist the habits that got me in trouble in the first place. I know what the right things to do are. I know what the right choices are. I know what I want to do, no, what I'm desperate to do.

The day before surgery my wife mentioned her best friend's mother-in-law had a VSG and lost a little weight but basically gained it all back, due to poor choices and fast food. And then another story about someone else the knew who experienced the same thing. She wasn't trying to get me to not have the surgery, but she was also concerned about me making bad choices. The surgery isn't a free ride to Thinsville if you make bad choices.

I'm going to take advantage of a therapist from the weight center to talk about things early and fairly often to help get my mind right about food. I want it to be a much more reasonable relationship. I'm not going to rely on the surgery to do it all. However, it's also scary. Many what-ifs.

If you haven't seen the "Fit to Fat Dad" on YouTube, I'll put a link below. If any of you followed the early years of The Biggest Loser, you might remember Matt Hoover who won the competition in 2005 and married the runner up, Suzie. He, like most of the contestants on that show, gained all of the weight back, plus some. He had a VSG in October 2019 and has been posting pretty regularly, the most recent just the day before yesterday. He has had tremendous success, but it's actually gone too far and he's lost too much weight, which he talks about. It comes from that fear of going back down that road of making bad decisions again. So he's going to start working with a therapist and dietician to try to find that balance so he can gain some weight and then even it out at a healthy level.

Anyway, I just needed to let some of this out, maybe get some feedback on what others have experienced. I'm sure I'm not the only one to go through this sort of thing. We all started out in similar spaces here, right?

Thanks for reading. Here is the link to Matt's YouTube channel if you are interested: Fat to Fit Dad

 

[3momchaos]

I haven’t even had my surgery yet, and regaining is my biggest fear. I just have to keep saying to myself, “Is what I’m eating worth it? Does it have a nutritional purpose? Don’t make all this hard work, this amazing tool that not everyone can have, be for nothing.” I know someone who went through the same surgery center as me, and she lost a good amount of weight, but she never stopped drinking alcohol. Her progress was good, but I wonder if she was just trading one unhealthy habit for another. Taking the mental health aspect of this seriously is, in my opinion, the key to success. I’m glad your healing well, and taking care of yourself.

 

[gzar]

A few things from my own experience that I'll share-

Making the right food choices is easier. Absolutely. This is because it takes so little to fill us up, and as long as we follow guidance on NOT drinking immediately before, during or up to 30 minutes afterwards - we stay full for a good long time. So while our brain was certainly telling us that this small salad with no meat was just going to make us hungrier for some "real food" it wound up being wrong. But have no doubt - if we cave to that brain craving you bet we can take a few drinks of water and almost immediately realize we do have room for some more food. And you can ingest an enormous amount of bad food, despite having a tiny stomach - we can just eat and eat and it dumps into our intestines the same way it did before surgery when we overate shocking amounts of food.

It is very awesome that you are exercising so early after recovery - this will be huge. As you know, exercise & getting proper nutrition will be critical to minimizing the loss of muscular tissue while you shed away the fat. Nobody wants to lose muscle, especially guys. I didn't start exercising until a few months after surgery, after I had already lost 50 lbs. When I started lifting again, my free weights were still set up from the last time I lifted - and what I used to do sets of - I could not do a single rep. It was shocking how much strength I lost, which could only have come from losing muscle tissue while my body literally consumed itself while I was starving it.

Exercise not only burns calories during the activity, but for up to 3 days afterwards as your body recovers, healing the micro cellular damages caused during exertion. Most places calls it "increased metabolism" which is too vague for me. So it's a double-whammy; burn calories and halt muscular degeneration. So...I would suggest since you are already active walking - start doing some strength training as soon as possible. The more muscle mass you can preserve the sooner, the better.

Over the past few weeks I've increased my daily calories and am trying to actually halt my weight loss, or even make some gains - even though I'm under 10 lbs from reaching my goal weight. I don't want to reach goal at the expense of being less healthy. I don't necessarily feel my goal weight is too high or low - it was an arbitrary goal set a year ago that looked good on paper. If I go under my goal in the future, I want it to be done as a coincidence of becoming more fit.

 

[WazzuCoug]

A few things from my own experience that I'll share-

Gary, thank you for sharing your experience. Not that long ago I used to be a gym regular and did a lot of weight training. Obviously I can't jump back into it yet, but after the first month I plan on working it in light amounts (like 5 lbs dumbbells) with higher reps and very slowly building on to that. I am genetically lucky as when I had my body scanned, it turned out I have significantly more muscle mass than men my age, so my training the physical trainer at the weight loss center was very happy about that.

I think what is troubling me right now is that I don't feel like I really recognize "fullness" yet. It's just strange how I feel compared to my food habits previously. I mean, I feel great, better ever day, so far, but I also feel that I've yet to recognized being full. Maybe it is because full in the past meant "stuffed" and uncomfortable, and now I'm learning just about just being satiated. It's just a strange thing, but I'm also excited for the future.

It helps to just write or say it out loud and "talk" it through with others.

Thanks again for commenting and sharing your experience. I appreciate it.

 

[Jensdish]

Great thread! Thanks to all who posted. I appreciate the insights and honesty.

 

[gzar]

I think what is troubling me right now is that I don't feel like I really recognize "fullness" yet.

Yeah this is something that seems to be different for alot of us. For a number of months I did not have a "full" feeling. I went from feeling hungry and enjoying eating, to instantly "I overate and am now experiencing moderate to high discomfort" There was no ramping up, no feeling of being satiated or satisfied - just the unexpected and unwelcome feeling of a giant rock blocking the bottom of my throat and desperate crave to drink.

Today I still cant say I ever feel full, only periods of absense of hunger. Some folks seem to have a different effect, rarely ever feeling hunger and always feeling full. I wish I was one of those lol. Never in my life have I looked at the clock and said "Oh my gosh, I forgot to eat"

 

[missyinacage]

Hi. I am a month out from surgery and have felt full exactly once. Refried beans were apparently too heavy for me to eat during the puree diet, even at the recommended amount. I also have yet to be actually hungry. I've been mentally hungry, where I'm like what can I eat, but I haven't had a hunger pang. And I totally get what you mean about wondering if your stomach is really so small now. I was super lucky, no nausea, no problem getting liquids down, felt amazing almost immediately. So it was like .. did he make the pouch too big? (RIght up to the refried bean incident lol) I think the first 6 weeks the plan they give you is designed to make sure you get what you need without you becoming hungry OR full. This is our time to learn how to eat for our new lifestyle.