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Depression

How far out are you from surgery? I love baking, and I don't use recipes, so I check a lot by tasting batters and such. While I have adjusted a lot of recipes so that I can also share in them, a lot of those changes do not taste right as batter, and then when I bake for others, there is usually too much sugar for me to taste as I normally would. It took some time to get used to the changes and enjoy my baking process again. It also took time to adjust to the amounts I can eat. I indulged in a single of my all time favorite Christmas cookies - and I took hours to finish it because it was full sugar. It was awesome to savor every different bite, instead of inhaling 20 cookies and barely tasting them. The change in relationship to food is difficult to get used to, but you will be able to find joy in it again.
 
How far out are you from surgery? I love baking, and I don't use recipes, so I check a lot by tasting batters and such. While I have adjusted a lot of recipes so that I can also share in them, a lot of those changes do not taste right as batter, and then when I bake for others, there is usually too much sugar for me to taste as I normally would. It took some time to get used to the changes and enjoy my baking process again. It also took time to adjust to the amounts I can eat. I indulged in a single of my all time favorite Christmas cookies - and I took hours to finish it because it was full sugar. It was awesome to savor every different bite, instead of inhaling 20 cookies and barely tasting them. The change in relationship to food is difficult to get used to, but you will be able to find joy in it again.
 
Dec 9th was my surg date. I literally cooked every day and night, so I do understand the relation to food aspect of it. I can’t enjoy dinner with my family because I pick over everything. My family doesn’t know about my surgery so it hard to hide. My GF is very supportive, and understand my frustrations but I get angry and wonder to myself if this was the right decision for me.
 
Hi Barry and welcome. What you're feeling is totally normal, it's one of the main reasons most surgeons require a psych consult prior to surgery. The good news is that it WILL get better! You're still so early on. You will be able to eat more than a bite or two in the future as you heal and your body adjusts. This is the time to let the weight fall off! And it will for sure. My first 6 months is when I lost most of my weight, before I could eat much.

To give you some perspective on typical meal size down the road, I'm at 10 months post-op and now my meals mimic the size of a Lean Cuisine or Healthy Choice meal. Still a small portion when we think about how much we were eating before, but it's actually more than enough food to enjoy it.

Hang in there. By springtime, you'll have lost major weight and your body will be up for more variety. And time really does fly.
 
Hi Barry and welcome. What you're feeling is totally normal, it's one of the main reasons most surgeons require a psych consult prior to surgery. The good news is that it WILL get better! You're still so early on. You will be able to eat more than a bite or two in the future as you heal and your body adjusts. This is the time to let the weight fall off! And it will for sure. My first 6 months is when I lost most of my weight, before I could eat much.

To give you some perspective on typical meal size down the road, I'm at 10 months post-op and now my meals mimic the size of a Lean Cuisine or Healthy Choice meal. Still a small portion when we think about how much we were eating before, but it's actually more than enough food to enjoy it.

Hang in there. By springtime, you'll have lost major weight and your body will be up for more variety. And time really does fly.
This is so helpful! Thank you! Now I can tell myself that in 10 months or less, I'll likely feel like a normal eater :)
 
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