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Freaking out

MANDY2910

MANDY2910

Member
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
 
Yes, you CAN do it on your own, but it is much harder to do and almost impossible to sustain. And the entire time, your hormones are telling you that you are starving and begging you to eat.

Go on YouTube or your programs website and watch an informational video that includes the how's and why's of weight loss and why surgery is so successful for the vast majority of people. Many people do gain some weight back. Look up the statistics. Focus on what you can do NOW to help yourself in the future.

I've lost and regained large amounts twice in the past and doing the exact same thing this time still scares me 2 years out. But I have a tool this time to help me when I'm not as strong as I should be. I also know exactly what I did to fail before and can use that knowledge to help me avoid those pit falls.

Change is hard. Do it anyway!
 
MANDY2910 said:
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
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Listen. At least go to the consult and see what the Dr says. Tell them you have these worries and thoughts. They may have advice or tell you it's totally normal to feel that way! My Dr told me that even if you gain back your weight, you most likely will never gain it ALL back so at least that's a bit comforting. And when I went and had my psych evaluation and everything I found out I had binge eating disorder so they made me do group therapy for 8 weeks before I could continue with the program. Plus having PCOS he said weight gain and holding onto the weight and not losing easily is part of that so I knew I needed extra help. And im looking at this surgery as something to help me, knowing full well so much will still be on me to do things right. Doesn't hurt to have some help.
 
It is easy to slip into old ways after dieting. Most people stop dieting and return to old habits when they reach their goal weight, that said, my dr told me WLS is not a diet, this is a commitment to making better food choices and a new way to approach and plan how to eat. WLS is a process with many appointments to determine eligibility. Starting with a food journal, what you eat, how much you eat, how often you eat, and even why you are eating? It is a journey. You can do this.
 
MANDY2910 said:
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
Click to expand...
The wonderful thing about WLS is it allows us to S L O W down and relearn eating the way our bodies are designed to work. You likely will lose most of your hunger hormones that tell you to eat, eat, eat, whether you are hungry or not. You will be able to relearn what being satiated feels like, unlike how you probably are now.

I had the same self-doubt before my gastric bypass. I mentioned it to my podiatrist (who also struggles with weight) who immediately said, "if you could do this on your own, you already would have done so." That was a moment of clarity for me. I could diet all I want, but keeping it off has been another story altogether.

I have very rarely found anyone who regrets having this surgery. Almost everyone seems to have rediscovered the joy of enjoying living a healthier lifestyle. No one here can advise you one way or another, but you will find so much helpful, non-judgmental support no matter what you choose to do. Good luck. ❤❤❤❤
 
KarenWV said:
The wonderful thing about WLS is it allows us to S L O W down and relearn eating the way our bodies are designed to work. You likely will lose most of your hunger hormones that tell you to eat, eat, eat, whether you are hungry or not. You will be able to relearn what being satiated feels like, unlike how you probably are now.

I had the same self-doubt before my gastric bypass. I mentioned it to my podiatrist (who also struggles with weight) who immediately said, "if you could do this on your own, you already would have done so." That was a moment of clarity for me. I could diet all I want, but keeping it off has been another story altogether.

I have very rarely found anyone who regrets having this surgery. Almost everyone seems to have rediscovered the joy of enjoying living a healthier lifestyle. No one here can advise you one way or another, but you will find so much helpful, non-judgmental support no matter what you choose to do. Good luck. ❤❤❤❤
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Thanks KarenWV… and you’re right. If I could do it in my own I would have already.
 
Nymiria said:
Listen. At least go to the consult and see what the Dr says. Tell them you have these worries and thoughts. They may have advice or tell you it's totally normal to feel that way! My Dr told me that even if you gain back your weight, you most likely will never gain it ALL back so at least that's a bit comforting. And when I went and had my psych evaluation and everything I found out I had binge eating disorder so they made me do group therapy for 8 weeks before I could continue with the program. Plus having PCOS he said weight gain and holding onto the weight and not losing easily is part of that so I knew I needed extra help. And im looking at this surgery as something to help me, knowing full well so much will still be on me to do things right. Doesn't hurt to have some help.
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How did you find out you had binge eating disorder? What were the signs that presented that made them think that. I don’t know much about it
 
MANDY2910 said:
How did you find out you had binge eating disorder? What were the signs that presented that made them think that. I don’t know much about it
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So at first I thought all overweight people were like me, and though we both consume too many calories - the biggest difference is the large amount of self-loathing and guilt that follow binges. You feel out of control and before you know it you've eaten way more than you wanted to even though you knew it was detrimental and you knew you'd feel terrible when through. Another thing binge eaters will do is starve themselves after a binge to "make up" for the extreme amount of calories they consumed the night before, only to eat the following night tons of food because they are so hungry when they eat. It's a cycle. And we often binge eat at night or secret and have rituals involving our food (like for me, I rather not eat in front of people)
 
Roni said:
It is easy to slip into old ways after dieting. Most people stop dieting and return to old habits when they reach their goal weight, that said, my dr told me WLS is not a diet, this is a commitment to making better food choices and a new way to approach and plan how to eat.
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Not to sound like a jerk, but I could argue that the same thing happens after WLS. MANY people go right back to their bad eating habits and gain back the weight. It’s the one big thing that discourages me as I struggle on this journey. Surgery didn’t take away my hunger and it is not going to protect me against eating bad food. I’m already starting to crave my favorite “junk foods” at week 4. I’m starting to wonder if it was really worth it.
 
Sometimes we convince ourselves out of things that would be beneficial to our well-being or self-sabotage. You’re only having the consultation visit. While listening to advice, requirements and risks/benefits, you can join the program and wait to have the surgery. They are teaching you lifestyle change approaches so regardless of whether you feel you are doing it on your own, you are even with surgical assistance. Whatever timeframe your insurance have, let’s say the standard 6 months, you’re learning new ways to build a healthy relationship with food, coping skills, better balanced diet tips etc. that will help you and if at month 6 you want to keep that part of the journey going postponing surgery a bit, it’s allowed. It’s a tough decision, just make sure you continue to research and keep yourself well informed, and most importantly you are ultimately in control. I wish you luck because it does become daunting as the appointment gets closer. Stay strong, well informed, and ask every single question that you can think of from risks based on your situation, support offered now and for life, and success rates for their patients. See if they have their own support group and check in. Also you will have access to their nutritionist from now on, don’t hesitate to check in with them whenever you need to (and depending on your insurance).
 
suzannethemom said:
Not to sound like a jerk, but I could argue that the same thing happens after WLS. MANY people go right back to their bad eating habits and gain back the weight. It’s the one big thing that discourages me as I struggle on this journey. Surgery didn’t take away my hunger and it is not going to protect me against eating bad food. I’m already starting to crave my favorite “junk foods” at week 4. I’m starting to wonder if it was really worth it.
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Bless your heart, you are stronger than you can imagine. You can try finding things to do to help distract you from those cravings. Drink lots of water. Of course start with your 64ozs, but you can gradually increase that amount and see if that helps ease some of your hunger. Or grab another protein shake, some low calorie/low carb yogurt, cottage cheese once you are allowed, etc.

You likely spent a lifetime developing less than healthy eating (and drinking) habits. Now you have the change to develop so many new habits, and hopefully you won't allow your brain hunger control you any more. The good news is that eventually you might choose to eat a bite or two of something you crave, but you will be more equipped to stop after those bites. Please don't be too hard on yourself. You will see those NSVs happening and they will be motivators to continue your new habits. You got this, girl! ❤❤
 
KarenWV said:
Oh, btw Suzanne, you definitely are NOT a jerk. In fact, you have entered a jerk-free zone, so you are in a safe space to write what you'd like!!! Lol
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Well, sometimes my negative views are taken the wrong way. I am a bit of a pessimist. It’s just my nature, but I appreciate your positive attitude. I think you’re right, a lifetime of bad eating habits aren’t just going to disappear overnight. It’s a daily battle for me, but a battle that I intend to WIN! Thank you for the much needed encouragement.
 
MANDY2910 said:
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
Click to expand...
The one thing that I had to come to terms with is it was ok to wonder if I was doing the right thing and even be anxious about it however the other thing I reminded myself of is WHY I am doing it. I understand that WLS is a tool like everything else and I also know my choices determine my results. And also keep in mind, you still have to “put in the work” with WLS. Everything that you need to do without WLS you have to do after WLS. This is a tool to help with that weight loss but you still have to do the work! My user name is what it is because too many people say WLS is the easy way out and it is not. The process takes time and there is work that has to happen after and sometimes our doubt comes from people who have an opinion but are not informed.

As was mentioned, at least go to the consult, do some online research and continue to talk to people. Everyone that I talked to I asked “ If you had the chance to do it again would you” and they all said yes. The benefit to my life is what is driving me. Keep a strong support circle but keep reminding yourself why you want to do it. You will be ok I promise. I started this process June 2021 so I absolutely understand the doubt but keep reminding yourself why you are doing it. Also, during the process, nothing is stopping you from still “putting the work in” while you wait to get through the entire process. If the time comes that you reach your goal and do not need WLS then you do not proceed.
 
MANDY2910 said:
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
Click to expand...
I have tried to do it own my own as well, but only lost about 50lbs, then the weight loss stop. The thing is I was on certain prescriptions to help me. Once the doctor took me off the medications, I was back at square one. I have tried adipex, qsymia, metformin, ozempic, which all gave me bad side effects..I lost pounds when I took the adipex, but the weight stop coming off after a month, and I was working out four times a week for a hour. It was almost has if my body said no more, because I started to just.loss like 2lbs once I lost about 50lbs prior...so I decided and along with my physicians to get the weight loss surgery. I'm thankful that I'm only dealing with one major issue which is the psuedotumor cerebri , and I have sleep apnea. But I'm always freaking out when it comes to doing something major like weight loss surgery. But I had to do what was right and what would benefit me and my health. Since you have the consult, go to it and ask all the questions that you need to ask to the surgeon, nurse etc..whoever is going to be on your care team.. My consult went well and I actually met the surgeon who is actually going to be doing the surgery, and I just stayed honest with him about how I eat, what I eat, and prior weight loss methods I done etc... if you have a physican that willing to listen to you, and understand then your consult should go well.
 
MANDY2910 said:
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
Click to expand...
You Got This & God has YOU!!! We ALL believe in You!
 
MANDY2910 said:
Ok so my consult is 6/1. I am having some doubts about moving forward. I don’t know if I’m just scared or what, but I am just feeling overwhelmed. I keep thinking I should be able to do this on my own. I have lost weight before and if I just “put in the work” I can do it again. Problem is I can lose weight but I never keep it off for long. I get complacent and turn back to my old ways. So there are two sides of my brain working against me at the moment. I know the chances of me losing and maintaining over 100 pounds is probably unlikely based off of my track record. But what if I do the exact same thing with weight loss surgery? Lose all the weight, get lazy, and the cycle goes unbroken! I don’t know I’m just confused. I’m tired of being overweight. My path felt so clear. Maybe my mind is just messing with me…
Click to expand...
You Got this Mandy!!!! I/we believe in YOU!!!
 
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