• American Bariatrics is a free online Bariatric Support Group. Register for your free account and get access to all of our great features!

Hello Everyone

BAB

BAB

Member
My name is Barb and I am new to this forum. I just got my surgery date of April, 11th. I have never joined a forum before but I think this will help me get through all the steps before and after surgery.
I have spent months researching all aspects of the Gastric Sleeve surgery. It has been a difficult decision to do the operation, but I feel that it is something that will help me get healthy. I have been overweight all my life. I did have success in my 30's of losing 100 pounds on WW. I ended up gaining it all back and much more after 1 year. I have had a lot of medical issues with many surgeries. Still have health problems and take lots of medication. This is a one of my main goal to just cut back on most of the medications.
I know it will not be easy, but I know that I am ready to start this journey.
I do have a question to ask the group, did you let everyone in your life know that you were going to have bariatric surgery? If so, what kind of feedback did you receive? I am hesitant to tell many people about it even though everyone will know soon enough after the operation.

Glad to be here,
Barb
 
BAB said:
My name is Barb and I am new to this forum. I just got my surgery date of April, 11th. I have never joined a forum before but I think this will help me get through all the steps before and after surgery.
I have spent months researching all aspects of the Gastric Sleeve surgery. It has been a difficult decision to do the operation, but I feel that it is something that will help me get healthy. I have been overweight all my life. I did have success in my 30's of losing 100 pounds on WW. I ended up gaining it all back and much more after 1 year. I have had a lot of medical issues with many surgeries. Still have health problems and take lots of medication. This is a one of my main goal to just cut back on most of the medications.
I know it will not be easy, but I know that I am ready to start this journey.
I do have a question to ask the group, did you let everyone in your life know that you were going to have bariatric surgery? If so, what kind of feedback did you receive? I am hesitant to tell many people about it even though everyone will know soon enough after the operation.

Glad to be here,
Barb
Click to expand...
Hi Bab and welcome! Congratulations on your date.

I'm with Diane, I only told a few select people about my surgery. It's been 11 months and only those same people know. Honestly, no one needs to ever find out. You change your eating habits completely and because of that, you would loose significant weight on that "diet" alone. The surgery is just the tool that helps you stick to it.

I have a large extended family. I have seen other family members who were open about their surgeries get critiqued and criticized behind their backs. Misery does love company and when someone is brave enough to make a change, it ruffles feathers. So I decided to keep my surgery private. It's one of the reasons I love this group so much. I get to discuss it with like-minded people without worry of whispers. :)
 
My sisters and Mom were in from the start. A few very close friends also helped me with my decision. After their positive feedback, I have been more open about having the surgery, though I do emphasize that the diet and exercise is the key. Everyone has a different set of family and friends so only you can make the decision to share or not based on the people in your life.
 
Hi Barb,
The only person that knows I had the surgery is my husband. My family is very judgmental and it's none of their business. I am only 8 days post-op (sleeve) but I started working on losing weight in August 2019 I was down 54 lbs prior to surgery so people at work had already noticed so I will just tell it is a continuous process of diet and exercise witch is true. Welcome!
 
Welcome! I have told my mom, sisters, aunt, husband knows (obviously), and my 3 kids know. My husband and kids have watched the animated surgery videos with me, so they all know what’s going to happen. I have told 3 of my friends, we’ve been friends for about 26 years, so they are more like sisters. I’m not worried about telling anyone else just because I’m proud that I am willing to make such a huge commitment to my health.
That being said, there is one person I have not told yet. My husbands step dad is a large part of our lives. His mom passed in 2011, and we are the only family he has in the state. He is close to 400 pounds, has a myriad of health problems, and going blind in one eye from his diabetes. He had 4 car accidents in 3 years, so he can’t drive anymore and he’s only 62. He lives in an apartment less than a mile from us, so when he calls for an emergency, which is a couple times a year, we are close. We don’t have the space for him to live with us, and I know I do not have the patience for him to live with us if we did. I know that sounds bad, but everyone has to have their limit. I take him to all his doctors appointments, after harassing him endlessly to actually make them. He is very depressed and I remind him frequently that I can take him to therapy, but he always refuses. I am waiting to tell him until after I see my surgeon and decide which surgery I am having. I am waiting for a couple reasons. One is that he worries endlessly, and he does not need to worry about this, he needs to worry about his own health. Second is that I will not be able to help him or drive him around for a few weeks, and my husband works full time, so we wanted to have a couple people on stand by if he has an emergency, so we wanted those people lined up first. The last reason is I don’t think he will understand why I want/need the surgery. Once I tell him I’m going to put it all out there as to why this is necessary for my health and happiness. I think he will be accepting but maybe not understanding.
If anyone asks about my weight loss after the surgery I will be open about it, with limitations. I’m not going to discuss my presurgery weight, and depending on who’s asking, I might not share how much I’ve lost. But like I said before, anyone who undergoes this process and is serious about making it a lifelong commitment must be strong and proud of their decision to make such a change.
 
Hi Barb! Welcome to the group. Really glad to have you. Congratulations on your surgery date. I am one of those who told a select few. Those who know have been extremely supportive. Especially my husband. He went to every doctor appointment with me and even did the 2 weeks clear liquids with me before surgery. You have found a group of supportive, kind and encouraging peers in this forum. We won't judge you, we're here to help. They have been a tremendous help to me!
 
Thanks you all for your input. It was interesting to see all the various answers. I am just going to stick with telling my husband, son, sister and best friend. It will make it easier being retired as mmitti said. I am nervous that people will think I am going the "easy route". I know that this path is not for the faint of heart. A lot of discipline will be needed. I am joining a support group as well so I can get some extra views. As long as I know I have others who are going through the same thing to vent, it will really help. Thanks again everyone.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top