Nervous and feeling overwhelmed at all the information they gave me. My family doesn't want me to have the surgery so there is no support there.... they just don't understand how frustrating it is to be on diets after diets and not get to where you want to be in life. On the liquid diet, do you have to stick to what your doctor suggests you drink or do any high protein drinks work? Is there anyone out there going through family not being supportive? How are you getting through it?
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- Thread starter annrmb
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JudyNY
Member
Welcome to the group! It can be very overwhelming, especially in the beginning. You are taking a big leap for better health and you should be proud of that regardless of the lack of support your family gives you. It might just come out of worry and hopefully in time they will come around. In any case, you have found a wonderful support system here. I wish you all the best on your journey.
Leiabeedoh
Member
Hello! My husband was against it at first, but he decided it was better to just be supportive of my choices. He was only against it because he saiid he loves me no matter my weight. He didn’t see the point.
suzannethemom
Member
My younger sister is not supportive of my decision. She has always been the “skinny one” and I was the “fat one” growing up. She thinks that I’m not fat enough to qualify for WLS, but she hasn’t seen me since a family funeral in 2010. We live in different states, she doesn’t even know me anymore, we hardly talk, so it seems seems ironic that she is being so judgmental. She said I should do the OPTIMA liquid diet instead because her neighbor did it and lost a bunch of weight. Ugh.
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RecoveringSecretEater
Member
Welcome! And great job for taking this step for you! I’ve gone back in forth but last year August took the plunge to start this journey. My sister is supportive, my mom no and she sends links to horror stories, friend of a friend of a friend’s mishap constantly. Whatever. Not too long ago, she actually pulled the “ I never disappointed my mom like you have me” when I was excited and told her I was approved by the insurance. I simply said “ the fact that I exist proves you disappointed grandma”. Instant shutdown. Anyway we will be here when you need us! As for the protein drink recommendation it could have more to do with added sugar. Just run the brands down with your nutritionist for guidance as to whether it’s ok. Good luck!
I posted about this when I first joined the group. About who to tell and why do I feel like I want to keep it to myself. These posts and these comments make me sure in my choice to tell very few people. I just don't want to deal with it. I am dealing with enough myself, and what I think/say/feel about myself. I really don't need anyone else's input. I told my wife, who is completely supportive. I told 1 of my best friends, (male and also over weight). He too is completely supportive, only if "I am I doing it for me and not the people around me". Which I thought was a great comment. I told my cousin, who we grew up the best of friends inseparable but drifted apart as we grew up. Still close, but life gets in the way. We still talk and hang out just not as close as kids, she seemed supportive but it felt fake. I don't really know how else to say it, but I immediately wished I didn't tell her for some reason. I told my sister in-law as well, she has seen me go up and down and struggle for 18 years and she also struggles with weight but has it pretty under control thru her own means. She was also supportive and excited for me. Otherwise, I only plan to tell my life-long best friend now. I just wanted to tell her in person so I am waiting till we meet up again. I am sure she will be completely supportive as well, but I am anxious to hear what she has to say. Otherwise, I don't think I plan to tell anyone else and when they ask the inevitable "How did you loose so much weight" I will probably just vaguely say by eating less and leave it alone.
I've always figured we all should tell as little or as much about our health decisions (including ANY surgeries) to anyone in our lives. I wouldn't tell most people about any gynecological procedures, so why share any other surgery including WLS details other than saying you want to live a healthier lifestyle by eating better and exercising more. Period.
missyinacage
Member
It is a lot of information and the entire idea of changing your lifestyle can be overwhelming. I suggest taking it one step at a time. Yes, you should follow all of your surgeons' suggestions, rather than go off on your own. While different programs offer differing opinions on pre-op requirements, I feel that you should do what YOUR doctors tell you, since you're going to have to follow their instructions for a long time.
My husband was totally against my surgery when I first decided I was having it. I had several members of my family ask why I couldn't do it "naturally". In the end, I am lucky enough that those I love also love me enough to do the research and learn about what WLS actually does for you and your body. There are videos online that explain the medical issues, as well as the benefits of WLS. My husband actually attended the pre-op class my program gives to learn more. He's currently beginning week 2 of his pre-op liquid diet.
That being said, it is entirely up to you who you tell and when you tell them. If you don't want to deal with others' opinions, you can keep it to yourself. If you feel you need the support of your family, help them understand why you are making this decision. And explain that it IS your decision, you are looking for support, not debate.
My husband was totally against my surgery when I first decided I was having it. I had several members of my family ask why I couldn't do it "naturally". In the end, I am lucky enough that those I love also love me enough to do the research and learn about what WLS actually does for you and your body. There are videos online that explain the medical issues, as well as the benefits of WLS. My husband actually attended the pre-op class my program gives to learn more. He's currently beginning week 2 of his pre-op liquid diet.
That being said, it is entirely up to you who you tell and when you tell them. If you don't want to deal with others' opinions, you can keep it to yourself. If you feel you need the support of your family, help them understand why you are making this decision. And explain that it IS your decision, you are looking for support, not debate.
My family was like, "oh well it is your body." No one visited me or called me. I really am alone also except for a few close friends. I'm here if you ever want to chat