I'm a very blunt person. Further, words that are written don't have inflections, so you can't make them sound helpful if the recipient doesn't feel helped. I was trying to say ask a professional because in the many years I've been here, people have jumped to conclusions or refused to ask for professional help because they got the wrong advuce and perception from reading another post..
I'm sorry my words came off the wrong way but they weren't intended to be hurtful. In addition to what I said above, I've had four deaths in my circle lately, which I've written about to this group. I've been so deeply depressed I've contemplated suicide several times. I've been posting much less because I've been in pain.
I think everyone deserves a break, especially when a person is usually helpful and supportive and has demonstrated that in 5,000 posts over 16 years, and suddenly it appears there's been a negative change. But I also support members who feel offended and wish to report others. I've done the same thing.
My offensive words were "You're not a doctor." That's a simple and true phrase, but it came off wrong. Sometimes people use this group for answers instead of telling a doctor. With a surgical procedure this serious, a doctor should be involved for every problem.
I made a clumsy mistake and I'm sorry. I hope people can understand and those who know me can support me, that we can drop it and move on. There's nothing to be gained by making this into a bigger deal. If you need more from me, please ask, or feel free to hate me or resent me. But on balance, I don't think I deserve to be written off because I made a comment that was taken the wrong way.